I love America.  I really, really do.  But honestly, American tourists can be so obnoxious in foreign countries!  I really noticed this while living in Italy and here is a selection of the more egregious offenses – feel free to share your own experiences in the comments section.

Ask the server for Macaroni and Cheese. One of my favorite restaurants in Florence (albeit a popular American tourist spot), Acqua al’ Due, offers a wonderful pasta sampler serving a selection of their delicious pasta dishes.  It’s a great deal for those like me who can’t decide between the many, mouthwatering choices on the pasta menu.  It’s not so great for those who like to be in control and know exactly what they’re getting.  Like the man who, after receiving one dish, demanded his server bring him a plate of macaroni and cheese.  Classy, dude.

Assume you’re getting screwed. I’ve never once been suckered by anyone in Italy (not counting the gypsy beggars that I’ve seen buy wine with their “earnings,” so now you know better than to give them a buck too).  My dad tells the story of a couple, also at Acqua al’ Due, who thought they were being taken advantage of with every course they received.  The man even asked the waiter, what would happen if he didn’t like one of the pastas in their sampler.  The reality is, among the other dining options in Florence, that place is fairly inexpensive, and a total steal for the quality of food and service.  Nonetheless, the man assumed he was being cheated, was rude to the staff and made the entire room uncomfortable.

Be fat. You rarely see obesity abroad, and more often than not, when you do see it, it’s one of our own.  Even sadder than the basic fact, I’ve seen overweight tourists demand special treatment for their condition.  In one especially cringe-worthy incident, a man demanded help to make it to the top of the Duomo.  Not cool, especially in a place as ancient as Italy.  Buildings are old, spaces are smaller and you will have to propel yourself almost everywhere.  Mi dispiace, ma non c’è qui un ascensore. (That’s Italian for “I’m sorry sir, but there isn’t an elevator in this place).

Speak at High Volumes with Extreme Gesturing. Most Italians you will encounter can speak English.  Speaking loudly and flailing your arms does not help them to understand you any better.

Dress as tacky as humanly possible. Just because no one you know can see you, doesn’t mean the rest of the world can’t.  Leave the Birkenstocks, JanSport backpacks, fraternity tees and jean shorts at home.  I am very familiar with the amount of walking you will do in Italy, but lucky for you, there are many comfortable  (often orthotic) footwear options that aren’t your running shoes – Cole Haan is one of my favorites, but Aerosoles offers some pretty options as well, and you will do as the Roman’s do with a pair of sporty Pumas.

All joking aside, the worst behavior is often what people remember best.  Remember that as soon as you step off the plane in another country, you are a casual diplomat for your homeland.  Do a favor for the good travelers out there – stop making the rest of us look bad.

Images courtesy of Tacky Tourist Photos